Wishful Thinking [C02]

CHAPTER 2: White Lies, Priorities, and Acceptance

“Dude, hurry up!” Kai’s voice was booming as we trudged along the campus towards our class.

“I’m hurrying! I’m hurrying!” I was catching my breath. I woke up late this morning, having literally 10 minutes to prepare for class, print out stuff, eat breakfast, and run to school. Its not that I didn’t set my alarm, I was just having a really really nice dream about --- nope, I won’t even go there. Good thing I lived in the dorms just a street across the campus.

“Of all the days to be late, you have to pick today! C’mon man, our prof’s gonna grill our ass. You know how she hates it when her students are late.” Kai, who was consequentially late because of me (we always try to go to class at the same time), was already a few feet away from me. Having the body of a freaking fighting machine gave him the perks of high endurance. The guy wasn’t even breaking a sweat!

“Damn you! Could you please slow down?” Have I mentioned I really hate him??

“Hah! See, you really should take up exercise and sports. It really helps.” And he grinned that toothy grin of him. I so wanna punch him right now.

“Yeah yeah. Shut it and let’s go.” I inhaled a large gulp of air and set out for the rest of the way. Our Trig prof is gonna kill us. Well, at least not that much.

---

All my life I have never lied to anyone intentionally or for bad intentions. Don’t get me wrong. I had my fair share of white lies and some really major ones, but nothing that would intentionally cause harm or despair to anyone. At least, none that I know of.

I can still remember the first time I said a lie. My mom asked me whether I enjoyed going to nursery school and whether everything was okay. I simply answered yes. The truth was, I got bullied by some of the kids, got my bag dumped in the trash bin by the same kids, and cried all the way home. I guess I did it so as to not worry my parents. Come to think of it, it was quite impressive I even thought of that reason at such a young age.

Most of the time, I only say white lies. Little things such as playing games instead of doing schoolwork or sleeping when I should have been doing my chores. I never went beyond mundane things.

However, I remembered one time in grade school when I intentionally poured glue all over the school things of a classmate I really despise. I was almost caught but managed to slipped away. The next week we were called one by one by the principal. When it was my turn, I broke down and told the truth. I really regretted that stupid mistake. In the end, that classmate of mine forgave me and my friends learned that even I can commit something that horrible.

I really believed that white lie doesn’t really hurt people. At least not that much. You can never guess how wrong I was.

---

“You suck!” Kai whined to me while the three of us were on our way to his car. Him, being the only and ultimately rich guy in our posse, was given the responsibility of providing transport. Although it may seem unfair for him, we know that he enjoys being able to help us. And that is one thing I most absolutely love about him. (I still generally hate him though)

“Hahaha!!! Ms. Hernan is really the best teacher ever!!” Kar tried hard not to laugh. as we rode the car. “I never knew you guys could shake it like that. Damn, you have moves!” Kar said between giggles.

Kai was driving (duh!! Its his baby!) with me on the front seat and Kar at the back. I was trying hard to appear pissed but that small adorable smile that was engraved on Kai’s face broke me and soon, we were all laughing.

“Well, I never did say I can’t dance.” Kai smirked then looked at me. “Now JJ here... That’s what I called pathetic dancing. It’s a good thing Ms. Hernan enjoyed watching you make a fool out of yourself.”

“Hah! Lame ass. I can dance! It was you Ms. Hernan was laughing at. I mean you’re like foreign meat. It’s a given we have to laugh at you.” I told him teasingly. Actually, it was quite funny how our block makes fun of him. Being the sole foreign student in our class, he was the focus of most ribbing and teasing with me being the forefront teaser. And although it was rather evil, Kai took it astride. He would just have that small smile in his face with a weird gleam in his eyes. Just like what he had right now.

“Shut up.” Kai said.

“Aw. Is the wittle babwy Amewican huwt? Don’t worry, we’ll have you shipped back home in the morning.” Kar teased him. I just laughed.

“Stop it guys.” Kai’s eyes tightened a little.

I abruptly stopped. “Sorry Kai. But you have to admit though. It was funny. Besides, I think Ms. Hernan has a little crush on you.”

“Yeah. Have you noticed that she was really enjoying you guys dancing? And the way her eyes were transfixed on you.” Kar added.

“Guys. That is just too weird. I mean I’m almost like her son.” Kai shivered, thinking about it. “Now that is an image I don’t want to be etched in my mind.”

After a moment of silence, Kar said out of a sudden. “Well, I don’t know about you guys. But she is hot for her age. Total MILF.”

Kai and I just stared at her. Then we laughed again. Hard. It’s a good thing we didn’t crash or anything.

---

For the almost two years that Kai, Kar and I had known each other, we had learned a lot about each other. I was the honorary joker and troublemaker, serious adviser and friend-to-cry-on, and the token poor guy. And from Kar’s girl shopping tendencies and patterns to her lovelife mannerisms and artistic spike, or Kai’s martial arts and gourmet food addiction to his extreme love for cars, cartoons, not to mention GIRLS (he brings the term ‘playboy’ to a whole new level) and easy humor, it was a miracle we could even stand each other. But I guess our diversity in personalities, likes, and strengths is what molds us three together.

But amidst our smooth sailing relationship, something was bound to happen. So far we’ve endured the pressure of social status, the challenges of academics, the prying of outsiders, the dangers of relationships both intimate and what-not, and even the limits of our own will and patience.

I could still remember when Kar met David in our freshmen 3rd term whom she went out on a date with. She was totally smitten on him and for almost two months, she didn’t have that much time for us. Then, one day after class, Kar asked us if she could talk to us. Her expression told us what to expect. We hadn’t had that much communication with her for that length of time (David was an extremely jealous person, enough said) and we were hurt, skeptical and wanting. She led us to our favorite spot on campus, on a windy terrace in one of the main buildings, and broke down. She hugged me and cried her heart out, talking about how David broke up with her saying that he wanted to take a break and date other people. For almost an hour, Kar cried on my shoulder all the while Kai was stroking her back and murmuring comforting words.

After that, we returned to our established routine. It was especially exhausting for us since we just entered our majors term and all of us were taking the same specialization. By then, Kar tried her best to earn our friendship back which she didn’t really have to. Kai and I understood that once a person falls in love, or at least thinks he/she is in love, peculiar and unpleasant things would inevitably happen. She even vowed to hold back in the relationship department for the meantime and promised to seek out our advice before going out with another guy. In all, we love her as a friend and even though we’ve known each other for barely a year, we felt as if it was almost a lifetime. Funny how that happens.

Then there was the time when we were at Kai’s house hanging out. It was around our freshmen 2nd term. Kai was kind enough to invite us to his house which I might say was not a house. It was a freaking mansion. If I were to explain the vast expanse of their house, it would take me around a whole page just to do so. So I won’t (I’ll prolly explain it later along the story). Anyways, since Kai’s house was closest to the university and it was rather large and accomodating, it had been our hangout place most of the time since first term. It might looked as if Kar and I was leeching off of him but Kai said that we were his friends and therefore we were welcome to it. Even though Kar and I don’t admit it that often, we were thankful to have Kai as a friend. So back to the story, while the three of us were lounging around with snacks and drinks littering the center table while playing Wii and PS3, his dad came upon us. He saw the state of the living room and immediately apprehended Kai. It was very humiliating how his dad berated him while Kar and I watched appalled from the corner seats. We heard words like “leeching” and “using you” or “damn kids”. It was too much for Kar so she hurriedly went out with tears flowing from her eyes. I rushed to catch her but stopped near the door. I looked back. Kai was looking at me with despair and sorry in his eyes. His dad was rather smug and contemplating at the same time. I said a “goodbye, see you tomorrow at class” to Kai barely getting it out and turned to his father. I looked him in the eyes and said the words I itched to shout out. “Sorry for not being someone you expected for Kai to befriend with. Kai maybe your son but you have no right to say those things to us or to Kai. Sorry sir but you are a cruel bastard. I’d hate to be friends with someone who had a father like you.” I spat back to his face. I looked at Kai again and gave him an assuring smile. I took one last look at his father’s mortified and reddening face and left. I caught up with Kar outside the gate while hailing for a taxi. I hugged her silently. We went home after that.

I’d like to say that after the “accident”, everything was fine. But it wasn’t. Kai avoided us like the plague. He would sit far away from us at class and keep to himself. Some people noticed the change and were barraging us with questions. Others took advantage of it (that would be a story for another time). The whole “fight” lasted for almost half the term. Kar and I never really hated Kai. How could we? He was the one-third of our group and without him, we were incomplete. So exactly 47 days after that fateful meeting with his father, we cornered him

<flashback>

It was the last period of the day. After we (Kar and I) were done reporting about the different examples of algorithms for Search Trees in our Data Structures and Algorithms course (Kai was suppose to be with us but because of what happened, well...), we waited for Kai on the junction between the two buildings where we always pass through when going home. Since Kai was the last reporter of the day, he lagged behind.

I shot up when we saw Kai walking towards us. He was busy fixing the straps and zippers of his backpack so he didn’t notice us until we were right in front of him. He stopped abruptly and looked up. He locked eyes with me then Kar.

“Uh...” Kai was surprised.

“So...” I said back.

“JJ... I’m...” Kai mumbled.

“Kai... Why d-“ I mumbled back.

“Oh for crying out loud, get it over with and just talk!” Kar, although livid, found it funny by the amusement flickering in her eyes. “Men!!”

“I’m sorry.” Kai blurted out. “I’m so sorry. About everything. I’m sorry about my dad. I’m sorry about not defending you. I’m sorry for making you cry Kar. I’m sorry for the words my father said. I’m sorry for bringing you in that situation in the first place. I’m sorry for not fighting for you guys. I’m sorry that you that I wasn’t a good friend. I’m sorry for-“

“Kai shut up.” I interrupted his mumbling. Then I looked at Kar and together, we hugged him.

The action was too much for Kai and he sobbed. It was the first time we’ve seen him cry. It was rare for him to show his feelings. He once told us that when his mom died, he didn’t cry openly. Instead he did it while he was on his room, at his bed, with his pillow over his face. He told us that he hated showing weakness, that it was wrong for a guy to cry. That was also the reason why he took studying martial arts deep in his psyche. Hetold us it strengthens him, provide a sort of release. So Kar and I was shocked at what happened.

“I’m so sorry. I’m really sorry.” Kai said amidst crying.

“Its okay Kai. We forgive you.” Kar said. “Actually, we don’t need to forgive you. You never have to say sorry. It wasn’t your fault. And even though, we admit it hurt us, we knew you didn’t mean it. It was your father’s fault. So don’t apologize for what he did.”

“But, I was the reason you have to experience that. If I hadn’t pushed you guys to hang out, or if we weren’t friends in the first place then you didn’t have to be hurt.” Kai reasoned.

“No no no. Don’t say that!” I shouted. I was taken aback with my reaction. “It wasn’t your fault. And we don’t care. What we care about is that we missed you and that we want to have you back. I don’t care if your father hates us, that’s his problem and obviously not yours. I don’t care if you have to lie to him about us being friends. I don’t care if he hurt us. We care about you. That’s all there is to it.” I don’t know if I was talking about a we or just I.

“I don’t deserve to be your friend.” Kai defeatedly argued.

“We don’t care.” Kar said again. “Friends are there for each other. We may get hurt or disappointed at times but that doesn’t mean it’s the end. You are our friend. Had been for the past five months. I know its too early to say this but it feels as if we’ve known each other longer. You’re the third piece of our three-piece puzzle and without you, we won’t be complete. We need you back.”

“Please.” I pleaded.

“But my father-“ Kai stopped abruptly. He got off our group hug and walked a few steps away. He was deep in thought for a few minutes then he got back that confident stance of him and looked back at us. “No.”

I faltered. I looked at him with teary eyes. Kar was probably doing the same. But when Kai saw that, he immediately added. “When I said ‘no’, I was saying it to my father. He had no right doing what he did and most certainly no right to hurt you. I won’t let him dictate who I am friends with. So no.” Then he smirked.

“And yes.” He smiled fully. “I miss you guys.” And he hugged us back. We were full circle again.

“However, if you ever mentioned to anyone what happened here, I will personally make your life a living hell? Capische?” He said it with much gusto in his voice that I was momentarily afraid. When I looked at his expression, he was trying hard not to laugh.

“Bastard!” I punched him lightly on his upper arm. “Ouch.” I forgot he was made of steel. Damn muscles.

He smirked. “I mean it.”

Kar just smiled at our antics and enjoyed our closeness.

<end flashback>

The next day, we were back on track. Our trio was a – wait for it… - a trio again. Our blockmates noticed it and they were surprisingly happy with it. Apparently, they liked us when we were all together and crazy so they actually felt bad about our so-called “fight”.

It was a half a year later during our sophomore 1st term that Kai’s father accepted us as his friend. We call him Mr. Triple M now. Apparently, his name was Mikael Mercer Montag and after learning about that, we teased him about it. He found it insulting yet funny at the same time.

And for a while, everything was good.

That is, until my yearly physical examination.

---

We arrived at Kai’s house around quarter to 4. And upon arriving we immediately situated ourselves in our routinized roles. Kai went to the kitchen to fix some snacks and drinks. Kar got into the bathroom to freshen up (girls!). I went to their humongous entertainment system (their TV was bigger than me!) and set up his Wii AND PS3 (we can both play them at the same time!) and all other paraphernalia it had. Hmm, wonder what we’re gonna play today? FF13, BlazBlue, Disydia or perhaps the Zelda game or that Assassin’s whatever. Either way, I’m quite sure this is gonna be a long day.

I was almost done when Kai got back with a tray full of three bowls full of different kind of chips, three clubhouse sandwiches (Kai, for a girl, really eats a lot!), a box full of different chocolate bars, two liters of Cola and reheated leftover pizza. I looked at it and thought about that time we had a fight brought about by his dad. Maybe, he had a reason to think that about us. I smiled. “Nah!”

“Dude, you’re getting better at it.” He put down the tray at the center table while looking at my set-up. “Nice job. It’s rather unnerving to know that you don’t even have any idea what PS or Wii was when I met you yet here you are setting it up like a freaking pro.”

“Huh. I’ve spent most of my time here in your place than I do at my dorm so I’m bound to pick up some talent along the way. Yay me! Master Set-Up King. No one shall ever defeat me.” I said sarcastically as I rolled my eyes.

“Haha. Very funny. Anyways, I’m just gonna go up and change my clothes. Tell Kar to get her face off the mirror. I’m quite sure the bathroom is pretty tired of her already.” He laughed while removing his shirt on the way.

“I heard that!” Kar came out of the bathroom just as Kai had took of his shirt. They stared at each other for a few seconds, Kar’s eyes darting downwards Kai’s perfect physique. I did too. And then, she blushed. I did too.

“Aaahhh!!! My eyes!!! Nooo!!! My virgin eyes are ruined!” Kar immediately backed up, acted as if closing her eyes after seeing the most hideous (ehem ehem) body on earth. Too late though, because I noticed it. Kai, was safe to say, oblivious and bought it.

“Aw. Don’t you like it?” Kai proceeded with displaying his outrageous muscles, from his flexing biceps, bulging pecs and rippling abs. He made a play with it by kissing his arms, striking a pose and flashing a wink before going up the stairs. Just then, he stopped.

“Wait, you’re still a virgin?” And he laughed all the way up. Kar blushed deeper.

“Brute!” Kar yelled after him. “That narcissistic bastard.” She mumbled while taking her place at the lazyboy chair.

She looked at me and I gave her a knowing smirk. She defiantly stared back and I cowered. Damn woman-specific skills. Whoever said ‘hell hath no fury like a woman scorned’ was probably understating it.

“Oh, Jess, didn’t you have that physical exam thing yesterday? What happened? What was that for?” She asked innocently, turning from fuming to saccharine in a second.

I lost my thoughts and immediately paled. “Uhmm... It was f-fine. Just g-got my measurements and stats taken plus all other tests. Same old same old.” God, I stuttered. She’ll know.

“Oh really? Then why the stutters? Hm?” She was skeptic. Her eyebrows rose. “Are you hiding something from us?”

“It’s nothing. Everything went fine.” I answered weakly.

“You’re not telling me something.” She pursed her lips.“I know when you lie JJ. So spill it out.” She was prying. Please no.

“It was nothing.” My voice pitched up. “Honestly, my doctor said that everything was fine. Nothing to worry about.” Please believe me.

Kar scrutinized me for a minute. Her eyes narrowed a bit.

“Fine, If you don’t want to tell me then don’t. But I expect explanations Jess and this talk is far from over.” She huffed. Then smiled.

“Now, let’s see. What do you want to play?” She grabbed the games and started looking. I exhaled silently.

I was scared. Both for myself and everyone else.

---

As a kid, I was deathly frail and weak. I never enjoyed playing outdoors and hated doing physical work. It was ironic. I had a fairly bulky body yet I was sickly, feeble and breakable. My whole medical history composed of eight cases of medical confinement, five emergency room trips and three near-death experiences. It’s a miracle my family was able to pay for all our medical bills. I once asked them about it when I was old enough to understand and they just smiled at me. They said not to bother about it and just be happy that I am okay right now. I did a little research and found out that I was born a weak baby, hence the numerous hospital visits. My parents did all they could so as to make me as healthy I can be. When I stepped on to highschool, I was as well as any other kid but the residual fear and worry was there. The only requirement my physician had was to have an annual physical exam so as to periodically evaluate my health.

So here I was on our family doctor’s office in a private practice building somewhere in Alabang. Since I was old enough to go (I’m 17 for crying out loud), I went all by myself. My parents trusted me enough to not go malling or something, which I was somehow known for.

All my tests were done and I was sitting at Dr. Sylva’s office waiting for her to come back. It was taking quite a long time and I was worried.

Finally, Dr. Sylva, or Mitra as I was fond of calling her, entered. “Ah, Jess Mago. It's nice to see you again.” The skin around her eyes tightened and her smile was half-meant. I knew something was different this time and I’m afraid to know what.

“Mitra.” I hugged her, releasing my frustrations while in her arms.

For the 17 years she had taken care of me ever since I was born, she was the only one who handled my medical file. She knows everything about me, from my physical traits down to my health problems. She watched me grew up from that four pound baby into a 185 lbs. teenager. She’s like a second mother, a godmother perhaps. But my parents loathed her.

She stepped back and took a seat. I followed. She handed me the results and I browsed through it. I was already used to these papers and I have almost full understanding of what it says.

I browsed through it.

Test 1: SAME.

Test 2: SAME:

Test 3: DECREASING.

Test 4: DECREASING.

Test 5: SAME.

Test 6: DECREASING.

Test 7: ....

“No.” I muttered as the papers fell off my hand. Mitra could only look at me with pity and sadness in her eyes.

---

I am a notorious white liar. I lie to almost everything, no matter how little or big it is. I guess its wrong to say things that are either untrue or severely exaggerated but as long no one gets hurt except me, it was okay. That was my philosophy.

TO BE CONTINUED...

NEXT CHAPTER: The Calm Before The Storm

American Idol 10 - Chris Medina "Breakeven"

I have always been a fan of The Scripts and almost all of their songs from "The Man Who Can't Be Moved" to "Live Like We're Dying". And I have to say that one of my most favorites among these songs is "Breakeven". While the song speaks of the unfairness of love and how this seem unbearable yet moving to the eyes of the underdog in a relationship, the song can be interpreted the other way around. However, one person showed and expressed what the real emotions and incentives behind the song are through his heartfelt and amazing rendition that left me and the whole world speechless and tearful.

American Idol Season 10 is perhaps a revamped and ultimately different (if better, i'm not exactly sure) version as compared to the previous seasons. With the leaving of Simon Cowell and Kara DioGuardi and the addition of Jennifer Lopez and Steven Tyler, the season is of different taste and persona than what it was once. I may not be a full AI fan but I do enjoy some of its quirky and jaw-dropping moments (especially the unforgettable performances of some of the contestants). From Kelly Clarkson to Kris Allen, the talent are unquestionable and without a doubt some of the best ever in the whole world. And with the start of this latest season, some contestants had already left an impression within me.

One of those people is Chris Medina. This 26 yer old barista from Illinois appeared on Jan 26's episode bringing with him his girlfriend Julia Ramos. Together for four years (two of which they were engaged), just two weeks before they were to marry, Julia got involved in a car accident that left her incapacitated with brain damage. Medina, instead of giving up his love for her, was able to found strength from it and made him love her more quoting "What kind of guy would I be if I walk out when she needed me the most". Watch the video below for his audition.

As Medina tried out for the show, he brought with him Julia and introduced her to the judges (where Steven Tyler even kissed her saying how Medina sang the song with so much love just for her). While some fans have expressed support for him (count me in!), others do think that this is a strategic appeal to compassion, if not pity, to the public. Either way, his actions and devotions speak for themselves.

Story: WISHFUL THINKING [Summary + Chapter List]

SUMMARY:

Jess Mago is living the sweet life. He is studying in one of the country’s most prestigious university, friends with two of the best persons he’d ever met and had almost everything he could ever wish for at the moment. Contented.

But within him lies a cloak-and-dagger sugar ache that he is unaware of. A devastating decay waiting for the right moment to make its presence known. What happens if that ache becomes unbearable? Inevitable.

Jess will realize that there is more to life than what it seems and that which appears to be is really not.

This is a story about how relationships and maturity marred with the struggles of everyday life and fate’s ever twisted mind can affect the seemingly pacific life of a boy on the brink of being a man. This is a story about the pleasures of unbridled desires and the pains of wanting something so close yet impossible to achieve. This is the story of how a single idea can affect multitudes of circumstances, leaving one person at the center of it all judged and amiss-ed. 

When we want something, we fight for it. Jess have to learn it the hard way. But what happens when wishful thinking seems more inviting than cruel reality?

CHAPTER LIST:

• Chapter 1: Just Another Ordinary Heartbreak 
• Chapter 2: White Lies, Priorities, and Acceptance 
• Chapter 3: The Calm Before The Storm 
• Chapter 4: The Rich Kid (Kai's Perspective) 

*Updates will be by the writer's convenience. 

Author's Note:

This story was something that came out from one of my works in a course I've taken a year ago. It started out as one chapter that I intend to leave just as it is. However, my muse reared its head and pushed me to continue it. The plot is banal and almost overrated and I have yet to pave its direction. Though I do have some plot that are quite interesting and hopefully unexpected. Some aspects I am planning to deal with will be quite deep and strange. I am a fan of cliff-hangers and unconventional writing so bear with me. I am a frustrated writer, somewhere between an amateur and an aspirer. So please if you see any point for improvement and appraisals, I am most grateful if you can share it with me. Thanks and have fun reading!

Wishful Thinking [C01]

CHAPTER 1: Just Another Ordinary Heartbreak

It was almost everyday I’d get my heart broken. 

Seeing them together, her arms around his back, his along her waist. The way she would smile as he gives her a look of adoration. The slight shift of his stance and the way she adapts to it seemingly as if they are one. It was a subtle yet obvious sign of ownership, a code of arms that binds them both in that so-called love. How annoyingly asinine. 

“Hey, stop it already. There’s no need to rub it off, you know.” I said, looking jokingly at them as if I was disgusted (which I really was).

“Awe. Someone’s getting jealous.” Kai said as he teasingly answered me in that sickly puppy-dog sort of way. 

I felt a flicker of embarrassment which momentarily disappeared. I hoped they didn’t noticed it.

“Don’t worry, Jess, we’ll find you someone.” Karina pacified, pointing a disapproving stare to her boyfriend, and to me with little shame in her deep brown eyes.

I took a deep breath and said “Right... like I haven’t heard that before,” resignation seeping from my voice.

“Oh suck it up. Its not our fault that you don’t seem to like any girl we’d point to you.” Kai pointed out. 

“That’s because he’s a gentleman Kai. He’s not like you who’d snatch any girl who offers herself to you. I mean, if I haven’t tamed you, you’d probably be switching between girls faster than superman fighting off crimes.” Karina fiercely interjected, all the while looking at me knowingly.

“Uhmm... thanks Kar, I think. Anyways, I have to go. My class starts in five minutes and I still need to walk like a mile to get to the building.” I lightly laughed as I picked up my bag, grabbed my lunch leftovers and stood up to get going. I was getting uncomfortable at the direction the conversation was going. Luckily, Kar saved me from the rest of it.

“Sure sure Jess. Meet up later after class at the main campus office, okay?” Kar worriedly asked as he and Kai started to gather their things as well. Kai was just looking alternately between me and Kar with that confused knot in his eyes.

“Okay. See you guys later.” As I turned to go, I caught a glimpse of them looking at me, Kar with a somber look on her face and Kai with a deep-in-thought gaze. Then the looks were quickly masked and they turned to each other, giving each other a peck on the lips. For me, it was more like French. 

I couldn’t help but feel scared and with a burst of intuition, I suddenly had this feeling that something either majorly good or bad will happen later the day. 

Looking back, they were walking the opposite way holding hands. With all things said and considered, I couldn’t help but feel alone.

---

Advanced Systems Design. My final class for the day. Oh, how I hated my course. Its already a year and a half and I’m still having second thoughts about taking Computer Science. I mean, I was dubbed the smartest person in our block (really, I was!) and I gladly accepted the recognition ( I didn't say I was that modest), but this was just too much. Our professor’s voice was like a lullaby pulling me to the depths of oblivion. The university should have training for professors in "How To Not Be Bring 101" to avoid becoming energy-sucking lifeless teaching drones. 

I wasn’t listening though. I was thinking of the first day I had stepped into the campus. It was the first day of classes. It was also the first time I met Kai and Karina.

<flashback>

I was lucky enough to get a scholarship into one of the most famous and most prestigious universities in the Philippines. I belonged to a lower middle class family (gosh, need I define it?) and being a student here is somewhat a far-fetched dream of mine. But here I was, wearing my worn-out clothes, amidst the so-called ‘high-class’ student body. I was scared yet exhilarated at the same time.

After walking around and exploring the campus, I went to find my room. Insanely enough, it was located at the other side of the five hectare campus so it took me around 15 minutes just to get there ( I got lost and had to ask directions from someone as well). At least I got some exercise.

The room was beyond my comprehension. It was air conditioned and equipped with high-tech gizmos that I don’t recognize or didn’t know of. Located at the center of the ceiling were wi-fi enabled LCD projectors that seemingly connects to the built-in computer at the right side of the room. There was also an OHP atthe far left, near two large aircon units. I was confounded and I felt inadequate.

I randomly took a seat in the middle of the class. There were only a few people, mostly quiet and alone as well. Guess everyone’s experiencing first day fright as well. At least, I’m not the only one feeling it.

After a few minutes, the room started filling up. When it seemed as if it was time, a guy (a foreigner, I take it) walked in, followed by who I assumed was our professor (because she was the only one carrying a laptop, a stack of brown paper, and some cables hanging out), and sat beside me. I barely acknowledged him.

So the class started and since it was our first day, the prof droned on about the university; the different places around, the rules and regulations, special information and other school trivia. She also welcomed us to being part of the university. After which, she started explaining what to expect about our course and about her subject. It took the whole period, roughly an hour and a half, to finish everything. By then, I had learned and absorbed a lot so my mind was fully loaded and ready to explode.

While readying to get out of the room to get to our block’s next class (I learned that as first year, we get to stay in a section or block until we can enroll on our own during the latter part of the year), the guy who sat beside me turned to me, grinned and held out his hand for a handshake.

“Hi, I’m Kai. Nice to meet you.” He drawled out in that full American accent of him.

I was dumbfounded. I didn’t react for a few moments. Such a straightforward approach, something I'm not used to. When his grin started to falter, I quickly composed myself and took his hand. 

“Hello. I’m J-Jess. Nice to meet you too.” I answered in perfect English. Our family maybe dirt poor compared to the rest of the student body but I grew up learning as much as I can. English was just some of the language I can speak (guess how many languages I know!). 

He unexpectedly pulled me into a one arm back-patting hug, an American gesture I later found out, and right there and then, we became friends.

<end of flashback>

I smiled foolishly as I remembered that day. I still can’t believe that he was my friend. We were on either end of the spectrum but we managed to break the barriers and become close friends, almost brotherly.

Kaiser Philippe Montag, or Kai as we call him, is, and always will be, a full-fledge American boy-next-door playboy. He’s the epitome of perfection. (And god, I hate him for that.) He was from the US of A and had lived all his life there. But his father’s relationship with a Filipino woman led to his family (Kai, his father and his older brother) moving to little old Philippines. Turns out, he decided to go to college here instead of being left out alone in the States.

His father was the CEO of an IT company based in America and the sudden move, although risky, brought new opportunities for the company as they open their first branch here in Manila. This was one of the reason he decided to take up ComSci; to follow his father's footsteps. His older brother was an engineer and is also currently on the final processes of establishing his own firm. 

Simply put, Kai is loaded. Seriously loaded. Not to mention that everyone vies for his attention, guys or girls, to the point of being pathetic just to win his friendship. Everybody likes him, wants to be him, and wants to be with him. I hated him back then, and until now. Just kidding, he’s my bestest friend <insert sarcasm here>. Either way, I was thankful to be his friend. Really I am.

I broke out of my reverie when the recorded bell tune rang. My last period for the day is done. Finally. As I walked out, I bade goodbye to some of my blockmates who I can actually say I like and tolerate. Then I made my way to the main campus office.

---

While making my way to the office, I saw Karina a few steps in front of me. Kai was a student assistant. Aside from being utterly handsome and rich (gosh, can he be any more perfect?), he was also insanely smart (yup, he can be 'perfecter'), perhaps smarter than me. And because of that, he also managed to grab on to a scholarship and become a student research assistant handpicked by the campus director himself.

I quickened my pace and, in a few seconds, was directly behind her. Kar didn’t seem to notice me, so I surprised her by hugging her from the back. 

“HEY WHAAA----“ She flailed but after realizing it was me, laughed and gushed loudly.

“OMG Jess. You jerk. You scared the hell out of me. I thought I was being molested or something.” She relaxed in my arms but I didn’t make a move to remove them from around her.

“Hahaha... Kar, no one would dare to do that. Not unless they want to be hospitalized for an eternity.” I smirked. hugging her a little too tight. Then, with my arms around her, we walked slowly, dragging ourselves towards the main campus building. As we stopped by an alcove just in front of the office door, I tried to think the first time Kai and I met her.

<flashback>

After the third period class of our very first day, Kai and I went to check out the cafeteria around campus (amazingly, there were a total of 10 of them scattered around campus). It was lunch time and I was hungry, and it looks as if Kai was too.

Along the way, we talked about ourselves. You know, the basic get-to-know questions. People were gawking over him. The university, having a good percentage of foreign students (Americans, Europeans, Africans, Australians, fellow Asians), was well known for having a diverse collection of students. And yet, it seems as if they were seeing Kai as having a race of his own.

We found our way towards Food Fantasy, one of the university\s numerous café houses which caters a wide range of light snacks, blended drinks and wholesome desserts. When we got in, we found a vacant table by the side. Then Kai abruptly turned to me.

“JJ, I’ll treat you.” He said and walked towards the counter. I was shocked, angered and humiliated all at the same time. I mean, here was a person I just met, someone who I don't even feel that close yet, and he does something totally arrogant and unexpected like this. Not that I care (at least free lunch) but a guy has his pride, you know?

It was a good thing there weren’t anyone near us and the only person who could’ve witnessed the scene was a rather beautiful girl with long black hair sitting two tables to my right. 

I looked at her and noticed that she was looking at me. She smiled then I did. 

“Hi.” I said, blushing crimson knowing that she just witnessed what happened.

“Hi. Cute boyfriend you’ve got there.” Pointing his lips towards Kai.

I paled as the words left her mouth. I couldn’t talk back. What did she say?

The fear and hesitation must’ve showed in my face when she hastily added, “Oh sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you. Don’t worry, it’s not a problem for me. Surprisingly, our university supports -”

I still can’t reply back, not understanding what she was saying. I darted my eyes towards Kai. He was already paying for the food. The girl at the counter was shamelessly flirting at him.

“- and it's not as if someone will try to hurt you. By the way, he’s really hot. What a catch.” I heard the girl say. She followed my gaze and saw that I was looking at Kai. Then I realized what she meant.

When I got my voice back, I said, “No no no no. You’ve got it all wrong. I’m not gay.” I was quick to deny.

“Oh. Damn. Uhm, sorry. Gosh I feel stupid. Its just that I assumed. I mean, it looks as if he was... It was really sweet and... You guys look so cute togeth-” She was blushing deep red and gushed with her words.

“Its okay. Its okay.” I said to calm her. Wow, talk about miscommunication. She blushed immensely and I tried hard not to chuckle.

When she calmed down, she said, “I don’t usually do that. I mean when I saw you guys I immediately assumed that you were, you know, together. Of course! Silly me! It's just the first day of classes so you two couldn’t have possibly known each other for that long. Or are you guys like childhood friends?” She was pacifying herself.

I was about to answer when Kai suddenly popped out of nowhere and stood beside me. I jumped as I didn't notice him approach.

“So who’s the pretty lady you’re talking to?” He asked me, while surreptitiously trying to sneak a look at the girl a few seats from us.

“Oh yeah... Wait. I don’t know your name. Um. I’m Jess and this is Kai.” I offered my hand.

She gladly took it and answered, “Nice to meet you. I’m Karina.” She winked at me and I blushed. Kai looked at me and just grinned.

I forgot I was mad at Kai.

<end of flashback>

Kar’s voice returned me from my trip down memory lane.

“You’re lucky you’re a good friend. Kai would’ve been royally pissed if it were some other guy.” It was normal for us to be close and physical like this. Aside from Kai, Kar was my other best friend (at least that’s how we see it). It's funny when people would usually confuse us as a couple. Others would tease us about Kai being jealous but we just laughed about that, seeing as how close all three of us were.

“Oh please. I could beat Kai any other day.” I huffed my chest acting tough and proud. 

“Yeah right. He’s just got a soft spot for you.” She laughed as we stopped just a few feet away from the doors of the main campus office.

Everyone knows that when it comes to fighting, Kai never backs down. He was a master of almost all martial arts forms (muay thai, karate, aikido, judo, kung fu, jujitsu, kendo, wushu, krav maga, capoeira, eskrima... the list goes on). He’s got the body of a powerful man, mad skills enough to almost kill anyone and the resources to descend hell upon someone. I’m just glad I will never get to his bad side (or that’s what I at least thought so). 

“Yup. And I got him wrapped around my fingers.” I jokingly added. 

I didn’t notice someone exiting the office and creep behind me. I was smiling when that person whispered into my ear, “Is that so JJ? Well, let’s see who’s gonna be wrapped around something when I’m through with you.”

My smile vanished and I tensed up. I immediately backed away from the guy but he caught me in the waist. Dear god, I’m dead.

“HAHAHAHA. That was too damn funny.” Kar, who was in front of me (obviously had seen what was coming) and watching my reactions the whole time, suddenly burst out laughing.

I knew it was Kai. I could smell his faint cologne. And if the voice didn’t give it away, the sturdy bulging arms wrapped around me did. I gulped. I’m seriously dead.

“K-Kai. Didn’t n-notice you there d-dude.” I stammered, knowing full well what’s coming next.

“Apparently. Now what was that you said again?” His arms tightened around me, almost leaving me breathless but not quite. His voice was serious, deep but with a trace of sick humor and delight.

“Oh. Nothing. I didn’t say anything. K-Kar, would you please stop laughing and get your neanderthal of a boyfriend off of me.” I looked at her with pleading eyes.

“But JJ, we all know what you really want.” He smiled at me angelically. Crap.

“Kai, please get your arms off of me. I can’t breathe.” I was in full pleading mode. This is so not good. I was starting to feel something inside and it scared me. 

Kar seemed to noticed it and stepped in. “Come on Kai, let Jess go. Besides I want to be the one in your arms."

“But JJ haven’t answered my question yet. So what was that again JJ? Who do you have wrapped in your finger?” Kai tightened his grip on me and I started to feel dizzy. I knew what was coming and I was panicking.

“It was no one man. I was just kidding.” I was starting to hyperventilate and was literally shaking. I can’t seem to breathe right. I was losing focus and the next thing I know, everything turned black.

---

“Jess, you okay?” Kar’s voice was soothing to my ears. It was caring, sincere and full of concern. I remembered my mom. 

“W-where am I?” I squinted my eyes, noticed that I was laying down and tried standing up.

“Don’t move. You might faint again. Just relax first.” Kar held me back and settled me back in.

“What happened?” I ask with a little confusion. My mind’s not fully functioning yet.

“You fainted.” Kai, who was standing just behind Kar out of my sight, appeared in my line of vision and answered me.

“Oh. Wha-“ I was gonna asked why but then I remembered. Oh shit. 

“Do you remember now?” Kar asked worriedly. She noticed that I seemed to be getting my bearings back.

“Y-yeah.” I didn’t know what to say. So I looked around and saw that we were in one of the rooms in the university clinic. Kar was sitting on a chair right beside my bed near my head and Kai was behind her.

“Are you feeling better now?” Kai asked me, getting my attention quickly.

“I feel fine. Just a little woozy.” I managed to squeeze in a chuckle.

Then suddenly, Kai spoke loudly,” What happened dude? You scared the hell out of us.” His voice was angry yet there was something there that I can’t seem to identify.

“Kai relax.” Kar firmly stated.

“But Kar, he freaking fainted on my arms. I didn’t know what could’ve happened. It might’ve been my fault.” His voice withered by the end of the sentence. 

Seeing that Kai was actually blaming himself for my fainting, I quickly answered, “No no no, It wasn’t your fault. I’m just tired or something.”

Kai looked at me than started to open his mouth but quickly shut it again. He scrutinized me for a minute then abruptly stood up.

“Kar, come with me. Let’s go ask the clinic doctor if we can get JJ out already.” He grabbed her by the arm and they immediately exited the room.

I was left there alone. Again. I was puzzled by Kai’s reaction. Then I realized that seeing me like that which could’ve either been his fault or not, he just needs to let out some air.

After laying down the bed for what’ve been like around 30 minutes, Kar came back in and told me to stand up. 

“Kai’s already starting his car. The doctor said we could bring you home now. But you need to have someone with you for quite a while so we decided to just hang out at Kai’s house. You can take your rest there. And since its Friday tomorrow, you could just sleep over at Kai’s house.” Kar was acting all serious and mom-like that I just had to tease her.

“Yes mom. I’ll do as you say. Dad’s waiting so let’s go.” Then I laughed seeing her flustered face.

“Well, I know you’re back to normal then.” She playfully smacked me at the back of my head as we walked out.

Before reaching Kai's car, which was parked in a rental parking space a few blocks away from campus, Kar pulled me into a tight hug.

Then she whispered, “He knows.”

TO BE CONTINUED...

A/N: So that’s the first part of my story. Interpret it as you wish. It is not yet done though obviously. It’s just the start of it. There’s gonna be more to go. Please tell me what you think of it by commenting below. This is really different and I find it quite weird yet exciting writing something like it. Hope you get my drift.

NEXT CHAPTER : White Lies, Priorities, and Acceptance

Saturday S17 Soiree - EK Trip

After three years in DLSU, we (me and my S17 friends) finally had the time to go to Enchanted Kingdom. What started out as a random plan on a fateful trip at the LRT became a reality when after approximately a week and a half of shotgun preparations and on-the-spot invites, at most ten of us where able to come.

The day started off fine with everyone being on time. Seriously. We had overcame the so-called Filipino time in which usual meeting happens like an hour late of the agreed time. So for example, if let's say we are to meet at 10am then most probably, most of everyone will come around 10:30 or 11am. Anyways, everyone was able to come on time (which was 10am). AJ, together with Ivan and Tolits, arrived first via AJ's car. They were followed by Heidz, Shau, Vali, JR and Tricko who came via commute from ATC. I arrived shortly via personal car with Jon (who leaves a subdivision away from EK) following. 

So what did we do upon arriving? PICTURE TAKING!. Lots and lots of picture taking. 

Vali, Heidz, Me, Shau, Tricko

Ivan, Me, JR, Shau, Vali, Heidz, Tolits, Tricko (with AJ holding the cam)

Yeah! We were the first ones in the park so there weren't much people yet

The gates opened around 11am and fortunately we were the first in line. Upon entering the park, picture taking again ensues. Since we were early, there weren't many people yet so we have at most an hour to enjoy a few of the rides. First stop was the Dodgem which was EK's version of bump cars. Can I just say? IT WAS SO SO BORING. As in the cars were slow, the controls were awful and the time was barely three minutes. We didn't even get to enjoy it fully. Anyways, we then went to one of my favorites, the Anchors Away which is basically this big swinging ship. Since the best seats are those on both ends, we decided to take them with me, Shau, AJ and Vali on one end and the others on the other end As seen in the pic below. Heidz and Ivan, who were scared rode in the middle.

On top row: Jon, Tricko, JR, Tolits; On bottom row (cut off by cam): Heidz, Ivan

Once done with the ride, we waqnted to go on the Jungle Log Jam but it was closed yet so we detoured towards Space Shuittle, the only roller coaster in the Philippines that can do a respectable loop-the-loop. Since there weren't many people, we were able to ride fast. We paired up (I was with Shau) while Heidz, Ivan, and Tolits decided to sit this one out (bunch of chickens haha!!). Anyways, so we were there excited and afraid. For a few minutes (more like three), the ride was one and we came out with our necks painful, and our tummies rumbling and doing cartwheels. We met up with the chickens (haha peace) and decided on lunch.

Jon eating Fish and Chips

AJ, Me, Shau done eating

Once lunch was done, we geared oput towards Jungle Log Jam, one of EK's wet rides. The line was so short we were able to ride with no waiting at all.

Us waiting in line

Us boarding the ride

Shau, Heidz, Me going down

Needless to say, after the ride, we were all WET. 

Us sporting our wet look

After Jungle Log Jam, we went off to Rialto, which is basically an interactive movie or something. It was kind of boring. More like a much improved version of a massage chair with a movie to watch.

While waiting at Rialto

After Rialto; From left to right: Shau, AJ, Heidz, Tolits, Ivan, Tricko, Me, JR, Vali (with Jon holding the cam)

After Rialto, the group broke off into two with Me, Shau, Jon, JR, and Vali heading off to ride Flying Fiesta which is basically an overgrown circular swing while the others rested and cam-whored. After the ride, we met up again and decided to try out the Triassic Tag which is EK's capitalist Lasertag. Eight of us, excluding Heidz and Shau, were separated into two groups with Me, AJ, Jon, Tolits in the black team and Tricko, JR, Vali, Ivan in the red team.

Black Team

Half of red team

Shau and Heidz cam-whoring

After the very tiring and satisfying game, our team, the Black team, won! We managed to get out with the most number of lives left (Aj = 13, Me = 12, Jon = 5, Tolits = 0). After the game, we headed out to finally try the ever famous and most in-demand ride the Riogrande Rapids. In this ride, you basically CANNOT NOT GET WET. And none of us escaped the water's clutches. For the rest of the day, we rode Jungle Log Jam and Riogrande Rapids once more. By the end of the day, around 6pm, there were already a lot of people (freaking field trip) so we decided to go home. But of course, no day is done without having a final bout of picture taking.

After changing/drying out our wet clothes

Preparing to leave

JUMPSHOT!!!

Another jumpshot

Final groupshot for the day

So the day ended and we all have to go home. JR went home the earliest around 5:30. Jon sided off with his parents. AJ, Ivan, Tricko, Vali, Tolits, Shau, Heidz all rode AJ's car (and they fit!) while I commuted. 

The six of them miraculously fit in AJ's car

All in all, it was a very fun day filled with hilarious moments, bonding, and memories. Here's hoping for a part two hopefully with more people coming.

gLeek upd8 - Gaga over Karofsky, Bieber-proof, Glee Club News

S01E20's "Theatricality" is a testament of how Glee going gaga over Gaga leads to wonderful performances such as the almost-identical "Bad Romance" and the stunning reinvention of "Poker Face". This time, the pop icon is again lending her soon-to-be-released single "Born This Way" in an upcoming eppy.

Max Adler, who plays Karofsky, a gay bully who terrorized Kurt throughout the show

Centered over Max Adler's character Karofsky, the track will be used as the focal song of a March/April episode that tackles gay bullying and out-of-the-closet struggles. Murphy stated, "I love that that song is anthem. This show is by nature optimistic, and I think a character like Karofsky could turn to booze or pills or alcohol and kill themselves or do something dark. But I also love Max and I love that character and I sorta want that character to have a happy ending. So I don't really know what that's going to be, but I do know we're going to do a whole episode that's about that song." The episode will air sometime between the release of the single in February and the release of Gaga's full Born This Way album in May.

In other news, Glee creator Ryan Murphy revealed to Perez Hilton that the show will not dedicate an entire episode to Justin Bieber contrary to the rumors that circulated weeks ago. Murphy added that no other tribute shows will be done for the rest of the season (which is understandable since the first half had been loaded with them). However, a small part of a big episode will include one of JB's songs, as Sam sings it to woo back Quinn. Trouble in Ken and Barbie's paradise? Hell yeah. Though I doubt it will last long with Sam's ultra cute lips (and mouth), Bieberfied hair and irresistable green eyes.

The ever lovable Kristin Chenoweth will also be coming back. Can't wait.

Glee Club News:

• Will/Emma: With Carl out of sight, the green-eyed monster might just make its way to Emma. Holly Holiday is back like sex-on-wheels (literally, she's the new sex education teacher) to spice up Will's otherwise pathetic lovelife while he turns the tables against Emma.

• Puck/Quinn/Sam: The Barbie couple is still going strong, or are they? See previous paragraphs for an idea on how Valentine's will go down for the two. However, I wouldn't rule out Puck just yet.

• Kurt/Blaine: Valentine's Day just oozes love in the air and I can't wait for these two to finally have some luvin'. As Darren Criss dished out to E!, "We're definitely going to start seeing some layers to the two of them. The pink elephant in the room will finally be addressed, let's put it that way." Oh la la, KLAINE is on demand.

• Artie/Brittany: Ah, my comfort couple Artie and Brittany will continue with their asinine, funny and cute-tastic relationship for the Valentine's Day episode. And oh yeah, Artie's bringing on the slow in slow motion.

gLeek upd8 - "Glee Super Bowl Episode"

Wazzup fellow gleeks? Already missing your daily Glee fix? Well, worry no more (for at least two weeks) cause Glee will be officially back on Jan 25 (AXN) and/or Feb 6 (ETC/JackTV), take your pick. Contrary to the previous season's mid-season hiatus (which lasted until mid-April last year), this season's second half will return early this year. Hell yeah!! So what should we look out for this coming episodes? Trust me, our wait will be worth it!

S02E11 is entitled "Glee Super Bowl Episode" which will be aired directly after SuperBowl XLV (in the US, duh!) so that means a day later for us folks here in the Philippines. (Tip: download madness) Anyways, the episode will be centered on a local football championship taking place in McKinley High with a supposed to be 'thrilling' half-time show while Sue's (oh how I love her!) Cheerios take on a cheering competition. Below are some pictures:

Here's our glee club boys plus Rachel geared with the school's football uniform. (Ouch, Rachel is in for a tough game)

Go girl power!

Glee members in their zombie costumes performing a mash-up with MJ's  "Thriller"

Oh oh, Kurt and Blaine meet-and-cheer with the parents.

Yep, they're bringing in the big guns.

Sources say that this episode will be the MOST EXPENSIVE episode yet (more so than the acclaimed Lady Gaga episode back in season 1) not only within the show but in television history as well (complete with fire breathers, jugglers, and bicycle motocross exhibitionists). The viewers will be treated with a mash-up performance of Michael Jackson's "Thriller" and another yet-to-be-unnamed song. And since the Black Eyed Peas is the actual Super Bowl's half-time entertainment, then its only natural for the kids to perform one of their songs as well (rumor has it, this specific song will be sung by our very own Charice). Gleeks should also expect songs of Lady Antebellum and Katy Perry. (Any idea people? I'm betting on Katy's "Fireworks" or perhaps "Hot N Cold".) Lea Michelle told Broadwayworld.com, “It’s definitely Glee-ified.” Oh yeah baby, another unexpected ending, dare I say. (totally stumped with "Furt's" ending, but I was expecting that to happen)

Recurring guest stars include Gwyneth Paltrow (looks like Holly Holiday's steaming up the Schuester as the sex education teacher) with a cameo by Katie Couric (one-on-one with Sue).